Minnowing - a pretty word to hear yourself say.

Today I began to gain my voice.
In truth I began to lose it...but isn't that somewhat glass is half empty? Now I'm having narcissistic episodes, showing symptoms of an even deeper disease. I love the sound of my new voice. Singing, speaking out of turn- and unnecessarily, I'm a puppet animated by a strangers voice. There's a keen awareness of disconnection between my physical and psychological self. Have you ever cut yourself with a sharp knife, leaving a flap of flesh grinning in your direction? I always go through this weird progression of thoughts:

1. That grisle can no longer be identified as ME and I must remove it from my thinking, feeling, living body.
2. What if that happless skin flap is every bit as ME as it gets?
3. Maybe if I stick it back where it belongs the two ME's will reconcile somehow?

After your instincts inform your approach as to how to deal with that piece of YOU-ness dangling off/on you, the only thing left to consider is the object-ness of one's body. Look at your hands, don't move and just look at them. Try not to feel any sensation but the weight of them. Aren't they heavy?

-S